Jasper is one

Our last year has been a particularly busy one. Adjusting to being a family of six has taken some getting used to, and I feel like things finally calmed down a couple of months ago. Probably thanks to Jasper sleeping through the night – something he did by himself and was extremely welcome. At first we thought it was a fluke, but it has continued. What a life changer!

When I think about Jasper, I think of him as our ‘leap of faith’ baby. Both Jared and I didn’t feel like a fourth baby was a particularly good idea for lots of reasons. However, we both felt overwhelmingly that there would always be a gap in our family if we didn’t have a fourth child. We could have waited until our other boys were older to have a fourth, but again, after weighing everything up, we decided we would prefer to have a fourth sooner, rather than later. During especially frantic moments I do sometimes wonder why we made life so crazy for ourselves, but I can quickly talk myself out of it. We chose this, and know that we wouldn’t want it any other way.

When I think back to giving birth to Jasper at home, it makes me smile. It was such an intense and emotional experience and I remember it so clearly. The boys arrived home from school 45 minutes after I gave birth to meet their new brother. I was tired and sore, and trying to sort myself out in the bathroom when they all walked in – “What’s that blood?”, “What are you doing?”. I will never know why I didn’t lock the bathroom door! One year later and the five of us adore Jasper. He has been our hardest baby – so unsettled and fussy, but now he seems happy and content, plus isn’t one is such a brilliant age?

Little things I don’t want to forget as you turn one:

  • How you flap madly and rotate your wrists and ankles. You are a very excitable person, which is definitely from me, not your dad.
  • Your face when you see something you’re unsure of. You look right round so that you can see my eyes, and when I smile you are instantly reassured.
  • How much your brothers love you. They entertain you, feed you, read to you, play with you, dance for you, carry you, build dens for you and desperately try to make you happy when you’re sad.
  • Your strange one-legged crawl. Always pushing with your left leg and dragging your right one behind.
  • How you seem to favour your left hand, just like your brother Rufus
  • How you had no teeth one evening and then woke up with five cutting through your gums.
  • Your whispy curly hair at the back and sides.
  • How you love balls, wheels and balloons.
  • How you are a very confusing eater and don’t seem to love much other than blueberries and bananas.
  • How you don’t mind being held by anyone, unless you are really tired. You are often carried around by your cousins and brothers and you don’t seem to mind.
  • How you absolutely love baths and showers.
  • How you have a really good throw. You throw things and then say: “Uh oh”.
  • How you can say “Uh oh”, “Dada”, “Mama”, “Hello” , “Moo” and “Buh” for ball.
  • How you point to show me where you want to be taken.
  • The look you have on your face when I’m carrying you around. You look so happy, and that there is no place you would rather be.

Happy Birthday Jasper – we love you!

E xx



  1. 3rd October 2019 / 11:43 am

    Aww absolutely beautiful,adorable… He growing up quickly, happy belated, Xx
    Beautiful family Xx

    • Esther
      26th October 2019 / 11:32 am

      Thanks Claire x

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